Birthday come early!

Rich and I are terrible at surprises. Our excitement gets the better of us and sooner than later, the cat is out of the bag. With this said... I've known about my birthday gift since Rich placed the order... I'll keep it a secret so you can be surprised! 


I get home and find a box...

Can you see where it is from!?

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I love my husband. He knows how to take not so subtle hints.

Beautiful!

Phew! That was exciting! Now neither of us will have a gift to open on our birthday. Oh well. I will be on the island of St. Lucia! Who needs a gift better than an island?!

On to something more serious.... I am majorly struggling with myself lately and I do this every single year. I am very unhappy with my body and how I feel. I have the blahs and I don't know how to snap out of it. Every time I fall off the wagon, it is more and more difficult to get back on. The weekends are the worst, so naturally I feel it on Monday the most. My body doesn't look how I think a runner should look, I feel gross from all the crap I eat and my pants don't fit. Hear me cry! 

I know.. if this is the worst of my problems, I shouldn't complain. Right? Wrong! I know of so many women who are beautiful and healthy and strong but are feeling exactly how I feel right now.  This is a HUGE struggle of mine and my body image differs so much from what other people see. I know other women struggle with this too because when I talk to my friends, I see beautiful girls... not the monsters they think they are! 

I read something today that hit me. Blogging is like reality television: we only write what we want other people to see. Everyone has struggles, and I have a feeling... I'm not alone here with what I'm going through. 

Alright, so there was my confession. Now what am I going to do about it? Baby steps. Baby steps are the only ones that build to success. I started over today by eating right and exercising. Except for two mini Twix bars (I confess), I ate very clean. 


Dinner was comfort food done right. I started by measuring  out two servings of pasta and two servings of meatballs. Portion control is something else I am working on. If I only make what I'm allowed to eat, overeating is eliminated!

 Add a sprinkle of cheese...... yum yum! Perfect meal for a cold and snowy night! 

After dinner, I took myself to the gym for a cardio kickboxing class. I love my instructor. He keeps us moving the whole hour and everyone is dripping with sweat at the end of the class. Definitely not for the light hearted! Kickboxing is a full body workout and great for runners! Lots of side to side plyometrics! I felt so much better when I walked out of the gym. Bring on the new self confidence I desperately need! This renewed image of myself will evolve slowly, but with time... all heals.